Round-to-it Recommends

This week's recommendations are for the grown-ups.

1) Acorn slippers
They don't make the exact model I have, but I would definitely buy any of their slippers again. I LOVE these things! I wear them around the house all the time and they are extremely comfortable. To the point that I have forgotten I have them on and gone to a friend's for dinner. Looked a bit funny, but I was comfortable! Mine are a suede outside and sheepskin inside and look a bit like elf shoes, but I don't really care because of how they feel. Did I mention these are seriously comfortable?

2) Parcel 104 Restaurant
This is our favorite restaurant in the Bay Area. It is in the unlikely location of the Santa Clara Marriott, which is great for us because it is about 5 minutes from our house. The current chef, Anthony Ippolito, is the nicest guy and an amazing chef. We really think the food, which has always been good, has gotten even better since he took over. They do several special dinners during the year, including the Wine and Cheesemakers Dinner, where every course has some kind of cheese in it, and the 104-Mile Dinner, where all of the ingredients (and I mean ALL of them) come from within 104 miles of the restaurant (good thing we live in California and not in Nebraska or it'd be pretty slim pickin's). There aren't really words to adequately describe how much we like this place, aside from saying that any time we get an evening out, this is where we head. Just go and check it out for yourself.

Some Pictures

On Sunday, we were finishing up the garden. My older daughter really loves gardening, and likes to be involved in all aspects of the process, from turning in compost, to choosing and planting seeds, watering, and especially harvesting. Right now, she checks our blueberry bush for ripe fruit and then gives any berries to her brother. She is allergic to raw blueberries (but fine with cooked ones), so she is happy to pass them on to him. This is her going through the seed box and picking the ones she wanted to plant. The compost bag made a perfect seat.

This morning, I had to take Ben back to the vet to recheck a urine sample and do one more blood test. While we were waiting for her to come back into the room, my youngest was entertaining herself with the crate. She was actually able to get entirely inside - and get back out again - but I didn't get a picture taken fast enough. It was better than her usual means of entertainment, which is to be as loud and obnoxious as possible.

Tonight

Got to spend some quality time at Urgent Care this evening. It's a parent's worst nightmare to be awakened in the middle of the night by the screams of pain associated with an ear infection. My youngest has been complaining of ear pain for a couple of days, but it hasn't been anything Motrin couldn't handle, so I haven't worried about having her seen. By this evening, she was crying in pain if I even touched the side of her head, so when Mike got home, I decided to take her in to avoid the middle-of-the-night misery I could see on the horizon.

Her last dose of Motrin had kicked in, so she was sound asleep at that point. I dragged her out of bed and got her into the car, where she proceeded to be the happiest sick kid ever seen (she did the same thing after being treated for pneumonia at 14 months old). We had quite the stimulating conversation about traffic lights on our way to the clinic. She played happily in the waiting room, which seemed busy, but we only waited about 30 minutes for her to be seen. The doctor checked her over (Dr. Barnett - she's great!) and told me that her ears are normal. She has a retraction in the eardrum in her right ear, which is most likely due to a difference in pressure in her head from having a stuffy nose, and that is probably what is causing the pain. I'm supposed to keep giving her Motrin as needed and see what happens. We're desperately keeping our fingers crossed that this goes away before we take her on a plane next week. I can only imagine the screams the pain would cause if it hasn't cleared yet.

So after our hour sojourn into the night, and much chatter about the moon and trains and traffic lights, we got home. She ate a few bites of a PB and J and went right back to sleep. Hopefully the rest of the night will pass peacefully.

The Weekend

Soccer practice for the older two, a BBQ with friends, and an evening in front of the TV. That sums up Saturday.

Registering for summer swim lessons, mass, errands, and finishing the garden rounds out Sunday.

A fairly typical weekend for us. Unfortunately, Mike is absolutely drowning in work right now, so he spent much of his weekend (except for the BBQ) slaving away. The poor guy will be more than ready for our trip next week. Don't tell the kids - they know we're going, but we've kept the dates from them so far - but we leave next Monday for Maui. We're all very excited about it!

Friday

Friday was an unexpectedly calm day since a friend of mine offered to take the baby with her for the afternoon so she could play with her daughter (thanks Charmian!). I had time free to get some work done at home and then do my Pilates class without having to bring her along. I even got to go to the post office without a tag-along, which was fantastic! Ah, the things you appreciate when you have kids.

I do Pilates once a week and usually have at least one other person in the class with me. This week, no one else came, so I worked with the instructor by myself. It was a good workout, a real full-body workout, and I'm sore today. The worst spot - the muscles along my sternum. Strange. Pilates has made a huge difference for me in strength, toning, and stability for my back. I love it and highly recommend it, especially if you can work on the reformer with a good instructor.

Friday night was the kids' school gala. There are two fundraising events each year, and the gala is the larger of the two. It's a fancy evening out for the parents, with food, an open bar, and silent and live auctions. Mike stayed home with the kids this year, so I went with a friend whose husband also stayed home. It was a fun evening at a really lovely venue (Silver Creek Valley Country Club in San Jose). I signed the kids up for a few parties and won a laser tag outing for my son and his friend with their teacher. The music was good and people actually danced this year, so it was more of a party than it has been in the past - definitely less stuffy-feeling and more relaxed. All-in-all, it was a fun evening and I'm glad I went.

Thursday

It's been a busy few days.

Thursday was the baby's music class, Music Together, which is usually pretty fun. I've been doing the same class for 6 1/2 years now, since my oldest was a year old, so all of the music is REALLY familiar - I think I'm on my third time through the series of collections. I keep going back, though, because my little one enjoys it and is just naturally musical (she sings ALL the time and is remarkably in tune) and the instructor is the most amazingly talented man I have ever seen. During the course of a session, he will play the mandolin, violin, viola, saw, banjo, and possibly others, plus you can see he genuinely loves what he's doing. He also loves to have the class do rounds and partner songs, which are my favorites (try getting some people together and singing "When the Saints Go Marching In", "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot", and "This Train is Bound for Glory" at the same time. Really cool!)

After that, we hit the garden center to get a few things to fill out the garden. I needed one more tomato plant and a few other random vegetables, plus a couple more bags of compost. I also got a tangerine tree to put in my big planter, so hopefully the girls will have home-grown tangerines in the future (my son doesn't like oranges in any form). I put my tomatoes on our front porch in pots this year, since the last couple of years they have completely overgrown my garden and kept anything else from growing. I'll have to keep them a bit more tame than I have in the past to keep them from overwhelming the pots, but they should do really well out there since the porch gets so much direct sun in the summer. Once things are starting to really come up, I'll post some pictures and keep you updated on the progress.

My son's tae kwon do class got moved from Friday to Thursday due to the school's fundraising auction on Friday night, so we had a later evening than usual. The baby fell asleep on the way home and REALLY didn't want to wake up, so she refused her dinner, had a quick bath, and went to bed. She didn't seem to miss not eating. My son was very proud that he got another stripe on his belt during class for learning his one-steps (he already has one for forms), so he only needs one more (for three-steps) to be ready for his next test. He is currently a blue-green belt, which is his sixth belt, and will go for a blue belt next time. It's taken him a long time to like the sport, but this year he finally enjoys it and has really taken to the forms. He even makes up his own, but he can rarely remember all of the motions he's put together.

Round-to-it Recommends

Each week I'll put up products and/or services that I have used and will happily recommend to others. These are not paid endorsements (ha!), but things that I personally like and want to share. Hopefully they'll be helpful to you, too.

1) Soft back/front pack child carriers
I have 2 different brands - the Ergo and the Beco.
This is the Ergo, which has more padding on the shoulder straps than the Beco, but is a bit bulkier. I like this one better for longer hikes. I don't have a picture of the Beco, but it's very similar. It is my daily activity pack, for things like grocery shopping or going into stores with narrow aisles and breakable things. The Beco has a longer back, so it is a bit more supportive for the baby, although mine doesn't seem to mind either one. At 2 years old and about 28 pounds, I can still comfortably hike for several miles with her on my back and have my hands free to handle the dog.

2) AVAC Swim School
We have been at AVAC for 6 1/2 years now, since my son was a year old. I love this program and recommend it to anyone who asks (and I am super picky about swim programs after having taught swimming for so many years). The pool is indoors and 90 degrees, so I don't mind getting in it for the parent-child classes (kids go on their own starting at age 3). It was built specifically for swim lessons, so the shallow end is only 2 feet deep, allowing even really little kids to be able to stand so they don't have to hang on the wall. The methodology makes sure that kids master a set of skills before they move on, so their stroke technique once they put it all together is excellent. Their teacher training is comprehensive and the instruction is fairly consistent from one instructor to the next (differences in personality can make a big difference in the overall experience, though). All 3 of my kids love it there and have become excellent swimmers and are very comfortable and confident in the water.

Back on Schedule

Last week was spring break for the kids. I can't stand spring break. It's not long enough to get onto a vacation schedule, but it's too long to stay on school schedule, so we end up with all of us getting on each other's nerves from being together without a plan for too long. Luckily, my parents came mid-week and that helped break things up for us. I, of course, forgot to take any pictures of my kids with their grandparents while they were here. Doh. Maybe I can photoshop something together to make it look like I was the responsible parent I meant to be.

The highlight of my parents' visit was our trip to Great America. Before our third child came along, we had season passes and even though the kids were too little to go on any of the real rides, they loved the water park and the kiddie rides. And it made sense to go since we live about 5 minutes away. Now with one who likes the big roller coasters, one who can ride the kiddie rides on her own, and one who can't stand any rides except the carousel, it doesn't seem worth going very often. Which means, they were very excited to go this past weekend. It turned out to be a beautiful day, the crowds were light, and no one had a meltdown. A stellar day, in my book. Our son rode his first looping roller coaster and loved it, but didn't want to go back on it later because he thought the tunnel was scary (never mind the loops!). Our older daughter tried a medium-sized coaster and didn't like it, but still loved the kiddie ones. And she and her brother had a blast going on rides together without an adult. We may go back once or twice more this season.

Now they are back in school and we're back to our normal schedule. The kids are in bed by 7, I'm doing laundry on my regular days (Wednesdays and Sundays), and the extras, like soccer and swimming, are back in full swing. I think I'm ready for a a vacation.

Tortilla soup

Tonight was tortilla soup night. I'm not much of a cook, but this is one thing I do well and we always enjoy it.

Tortilla Soup

Ingredients:
Roasted chicken (I use 1 chicken for 2 people) from Safeway or Costco
3 carrots
3 celery stalks
1 yellow onion
Salt to taste
1 (or more) avocado
1 lime
1 block jack cheese
1 block fontina cheese
1 bunch green onions
1 bunch cilantro
1 bag Mission tortilla strips

To make stock:
Remove meat from chicken. Cut into bite-size pieces and set aside.
Put chicken carcass (including skin) into large pot.
Cut carrots and celery into 4 or 5 pieces. Add to pot.
Cut onion into large pieces. Add to pot.
Add water to cover everything in pot.
Cook over high heat until boiling, then lower to simmer. Simmer for at least 2 hours or until vegetables are mushy. Remove from heat.
Remove chicken bits and vegetables with a spider or slotted spoon. Strain stock through a fine strainer to remove small pieces (if desired).
Skim fat (usually darker in color than stock) using a large spoon until all bubbles are gone.
Salt stock to desired taste. I don’t add any other seasoning since the chicken has a lot of flavor from the spices they use for roasting it.
If you are not using the stock right away, put it into the fridge until you are ready for it.

To prepare:
Pour stock into pot and heat.
Peel and cube avocado. Toss with lime juice.
Cube both cheeses.
Thinly slice green onion.
Remove leaves from cilantro and chop into small slices.
Heat chicken in microwave 1-2 minutes.

To serve:
Layer chicken, tortilla chips, cheese, avocado, green onion, and cilantro as desired in bowl. Ladle stock over ingredients.

Hike

My parents have been visiting, so I haven't had time to update this as often as I'd like. It's been good to see them, though, and the kids are loving having them around.



On Wednesday, I took all 3 kids and the dog on a hike. I do this hike with friends most Wednesday mornings, but the 2 older kids have never done it with me and really wanted to see where we go. I take the little one with me in the backpack each time, so it was old hat for her. She did get to walk part of it for the first time, though, which she thought was very cool. It's about a 3 mile loop and I hadn't planned on doing the whole thing, but the big kids really wanted to see it all, so we headed up the hill. We took our time - it normally takes me a little over an hour and we finished it in about 2 hours - got to see lots of flowers, birds, and the tadpoles. My son loved the little waterfalls in the stream on the way back (he's been obsessed with waterfalls since before he could talk).


I usually take the dog with me when we do this hike and he does fine, but usually really lags on the downhill sections. This time, the kids were in front of me and he absolutely had to keep them in his sight at all times. He did not like it when my son got ahead of us and wasn't easily visible and pulled to get to him, which is really unusual. I haven't seen this protective side of him towards the kids before - not overt, just wanting to keep track of them and keep them close.It was interesting to see him react so differently on a hike he's done so many times before.

Macaroni and cheese, broccoli, and tuna casserole

Mike and I have a thing for "white trash" food. I don't say that to be derogatory, it's just our way of describing comfort food that is very far from fancy. This is one of our favorites, which we had for dinner tonight. It's easy and was good on a cold night like tonight.

Macaroni and Cheese, Broccoli, and Tuna Casserole

Ingredients:
(all amounts are approximate and to taste)
1 large package Stouffer's frozen macaroni and cheese
broccoli
1/2 cup onion, chopped (I use the pre-chopped onion you can get from the grocery.)
2 cans tuna, packed in water
shredded cheddar cheese (about 1 cup)
1/2 cup sour cream
1 Tbs. butter or olive oil or combination of both

Directions:
Assemble all ingredients in a 1 quart casserole dish.
Cut broccoli into bite-sized pieces. Steam in pot or in microwave until tender, but not soft (mushy broccoli is gross!). Put in casserole dish.
In a small pan, melt butter and saute onion over low heat until soft and transluscent, about 5 minutes. Add to the casserole dish.
While those are cooking, prepare the macaroni and cheese in the microwave according to the package directions.
Drain the tuna and add to the broccoli and onions.
Add the macaroni and cheese when it is done cooking.
Mix everything thoroughly.
Add the sour cream and mix until incorporated.
Press noddle mixture gently into the dish until top is smooth. Top with shredded cheese.
Bake at 375 degrees until cheese is melted and brown on top, approximately 15 minutes. Watch carefully to prevent burning.

I bake this in our toaster oven and it works very well, but I'm sure it would be fine in the regular oven, too. It might take a bit longer, so just watch for when the cheese looks as done as you like it.

A Rather Blustery Day

We had a seriously windy and cold day today. At one point, the 2 older kids were attempting to play outside. My son came in and said, " Guess how many layers of clothes I have on!". I guessed three. He was sorely disappointed when I got it right. I just happened to be wearing the same number of layers - inside! His sister came in with her fleece zipped up over her mouth and her hair looking like it had been done by a leaf-blower (okay, that's not unusal for her, but you get the idea). Needless to say, they didn't stay out for very long, so I was treated to the ruckus the two of them decided to kick up while I was trying to edit some articles for our national dog club's magazine. Luckily, the little one was still asleep, so she wasn't getting caught up in the middle of the melee.

Since the kids are on spring break this week, I've been taking advantage of the free child care at the Y. An hour and a half each day is something not to be wasted! My legs are killing me from my last 2 workouts (ran for an hour on Monday and did an hour of cycling today), but at least I don't feel guilty about eating those doughnuts for breakfast!

What a crock!

I'd been talking with some friends at the kids' school about cooking with a crockpot and some of them absolutely swear by it, so I finally got a new crockpot (our old one was way too small to make anything that would feed all five of us) and decided to give it a whirl. One of those friends sent a link to a crockpot cooking blog A Year of Crockpotting, where I found a recipe for ropa vieja, a Cuban beef dish that Mike really likes. It seemed easy enough - get the ingredients, put them into the crock, and let it go for the day. We even had most of the stuff for it, so there was minimal shopping involved (a big plus with 3 kids home for spring break!).

It turned out to be a phenomenal success! (I'll bet you thought I was going to say it was horrible.) Mike was home for the day on Saturday - his first day home in almost 2 weeks - so he took over after I got it set up and started and tinkered with it a little bit. Not much though, so what we had was pretty true to the recipe. He also made some Cuban rice to go with it that was fantastic. The one thing we forgot was bread, which would have been great for soaking up the sauce, but otherwise, it was a wonderful dinner and one we would definitely do again. And it was even better for lunch today.

Ropa Vieja

Ingredients:
--3 lbs meat (get what's on sale. Stew meat, chuck roast, steaks, whatever.)
--1/2 cup chicken broth
--1/4 cup apple cider vinegar (could use white)
--1 T cumin
--1 tsp smoked paprika
--1 tsp salt
--1/2 tsp black pepper
--1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
--1 large red onion, chopped
--2 red bell peppers, chopped
--2 med yellow apples, grated
--3 stalks celery, chopped
--3 cloves smashed and chopped garlic
--1/2 cup cilantro leaves


Directions:
I used a 6.5 quart crockpot. I think you'll need at least a 5 quart----this is a lot of food.

Combine all of the dry spices in a bowl. Rub the spices all over the piece (or pieces) of meat you are using. Put the meat into your crockpot. Dump any extra spice on top.
Coarsely chop the vegetables and add to the pot.
Smash the garlic, take the leaves off the cilantro stems, and add.
Peel the apples, and grate them into the pot with a cheese grater.
Add the chicken broth and vinegar.
Cover and cook on low for a very long time, or on high for a pretty long time. I'd go for at least 10 hours on low and at least 7 hours on high, checking about 2 hours before serving to see if you can shred the meat with forks. (This is when we added the tomatoes.) If you can't shred the meat, cook for longer, or remove the meat and cut in long slices, then return to the pot.
Ropa Vieja means "old clothes"---the meat and vegetables should be shreddy and fully intertwined. The longer and slower you cook this, the better. There is plenty of moisture from the chicken broth and vinegar---if you are a peeker, you may need to add more chicken broth; but otherwise, you'll get a good amount of juice at the bottom of the pot.
Serve over brown or white rice, with a ladle full of broth.


Cuban Yellow Rice

Ingredients:
1 cup converted rice
1 small red pepper (or green, or mix)
1 small onion
3 small cloves garlic
2-3 Tbs. vegetable oil
1/2 cup frozen peas
1/8 tsp. saffron, ground (or 2 Tbs. annato oil)
3 Tbs. boiling water
1 tsp. salt
1/4-1/2 tsp. ground cumin
1/2 tsp. paprika (half hot, if desired)
1/8-1/4 tsp. ground black pepper
2 cups low salt chicken stock

Directions:
Measure spices. Steep saffron in boiling water.
Chop pepper, onion, and garlic to small dice. Saute in oil over medium heat until translucent, about 10 minutes.
Add rice, saute 3-4 minutes until rice is translucent.
Add spices and saffron water and cook another 30 seconds to 1 minute until the saffron water is absorbed and the rice turns deep yellow.
Add stock and peas, stir well.
Cover and cook over low heat for 20 minutes.
Remove from heat and allow to rest undisturbed 10-15 minutes.
Remove lid, fluff with fork, and serve.

Postscript

I found out this evening that Audubon's brother, Ancho - who is also Zatarain's father - died yesterday of hemangiosarcoma. It's taking far too many of our great dogs these days. May he now play happily with his brothers, Audubon and Jed, at the Rainbow Bridge.

To learn more about the research that is being conducted to try to prevent this disease and several others in our great breed, please check out the Leonberger Health Foundation site. We have submitted blood and information from both of our dogs as part of the ongoing studies, and we also support the organization through donations. If you would like to help out, click here.

The Dog

We currently have one dog named Zatarain, after the New Orleans-style rice mix company. He is a three-year-old Leonberger, which is a big dog related to the Saint Bernard, Newfoundland, and Great Pyrenees. At 100 pounds, he isn't as big as most male Leos - he'd actually make a beautiful female with his build and size - but we weren't looking for a big guy this time. I really wanted a Leo with a good working temperament, and I definitely got what I wanted. So far, I haven't made the time to work with him like I should, and I'm hoping to remedy that soon. He does go to obedience class every week, so he's a good dog and he's ready to start doing trials. I just need to make the commitment to get him entered - around soccer games, school functions, dog get-togethers, family things, etc.

I've done a bit of tracking with Z, as he's got amazing natural instincts for it, and a little bit of carting, too. he seems to be able to pick up on things really quickly and he tries really hard to follow directions, so he's pretty easy to train. He loves to swim and is very strong in the water, so he should do well with water training, if I can teach him to hold on to things. It's the one thing he doesn't naturally do. He'll bring things back - and loves to play fetch until he's ready to drop - but he always drops whatever it is at my feet instead of holding on to it. At least I don't have to chase him for the ball. So that's where my training with him needs to focus now, on getting him to hold and carry things so we can move forward to bigger and more exciting things.

Zatarain is our second Leonberger. Our first, and our first dog together (I grew up with a dachshund and Mike had a couple of German Shepherds), was Audubon, named after Audubon Park in New Orleans. He died on October 28, 2009 at the age of 9 1/2 of suspected hemangiosarcoma of the spleen that had metastasized to his lungs. He was an amazing dog, incredibly enthusiastic about working in the water - he got both is WD and WRD titles before I retired him - and always had his own opinion about how things should be done. He won over many a child who was fearful of dogs and he was a beautiful and regal example of all that a Leonberger should be. We still miss him dearly.

Audubon was clearly the top dog in our house, behind Ben, of course. The queen- bee cat rules everyone with an iron paw! Zatarain remained a ridiculous puppy for a long time, really until Audubon's death. Once Audubon was gone, he realized it was all up to him and he has taken on the responsibility very seriously. He still does some completely ridiculous things, like bark like a mad fool when anyone dares to walk past his house, but he grew up very quickly after Audubon died and we saw a profound change in him within a week or so. We won't be getting another dog for a while to give Zatarain the chance to be an only dog. I don't want to wait too long, though, since these guys don't live that long and it would be nice for a puppy to be able to play with Zatarain before he becomes a grumpy old man like his Uncle Audubon was when he came home.

For more information about Leonbergers, click here.

The cats

We have two cats, Beignet (pronounced Ben-yay) and Chicory. Strange names, I know, but we started this theme of naming our animals after things from New Orleans. It's worked out fine so far, but we'll have to see how long we can keep it up as we add more animals to our lives.

Ben is almost 18 years old (we say May 1 is her birthday, but we don't know for sure) - she's the tabby in front - and is starting to have the problems you see in really old cats. She's been completely healthy until now, so we've been very lucky. Of course, with an inside cat, how could she possibly get sick! (Lesson for the day - keep your cats inside, unless you really don't like them and would prefer to see them live for less than 10 years.) Her kidneys have just started to fail, which is one of the most common causes of death in old cats. So every night, I get to give her subcutaneous fluids, which means I have an IV bag hanging in my laundry room, a sharps container by the sink, and baggies full of needles. How do you explain that one if your house gets searched - "No, really officer, it's for the cat!"?

As you can see in the picture, we now have a blue tarp for a bedspread. Lovely addition to our bedroom decor, don't you think? When Ben first got sick - this started as a kidney infection that we're still trying to fight - she decided it took too long to go to the litter box, so she was peeing on our bed instead. We don't trust her to stop being lazy even though she's feeling better, so the tarp stays. What we do for our animals.

Chicory is 14 1/2 and you'd never know it to look at him. He has the most amazingly glossy black coat. He's the more outgoing of the two cats, loves to sit in people's laps and be pet. He and the dog are good buddies and will play together (more on that later), which is pretty funny since Chicory is 9 pounds and Zatarain (the New Orleans thing again) is 100 pounds and has a head the size of Chicory's entire body. When they play chase around the house, it sounds like a herd of elephants has decided to tromp down the hallway.

Now you've got a not-so-brief introduction to the Zoo Crew. There will be more to come, I assure you.

My First Post

My very first blog post. Hopefully I have something useful to add to the world by doing this, but if not, oh well. I'll start with an introduction and go from there.

I moved to California in 1992, right after college, with my then-boyfriend, now-husband, Mike with grand plans for me to get my master's degree in marine biology and him to get his law degree. He got in and I didn't. So we ended up here, 3 kids later, him working his tail off at a law firm and me holding down the fort - most of the time barely - at home. I now have a degree in biology that I use for driving the kids to school, grocery shopping, driving the kids to swimming, working out, driving the kids to soccer, training the dog, driving the kids to music. You get the idea.

To be honest, I never envisioned my life like this. I swore when I worked as a nanny that I would never have my own kids. I had enough with other people's kids and I certainly didn't need my own. Apparently God got a good laugh out of that one, so He blessed me and my husband with 3 of the greatest kids ever. So now this is my life and I love it. It's crazy, it's busy, it's funny, it's sad, and I wouldn't change it for anything. Okay, maybe for a house on the beach on Maui, but only if I could bring the kids and husband and chaos with me.